shut up, depression

Have you ever been so incredibly deep in a depressive pit you don’t properly acknowledge the passage of time? That’s apparently where I’ve been the last 142 days. But here I am, moving forward god dammit.

The job I was so thoroughly happy with earlier this year turned out…sub-optimally. Suffice it to say I’ve spent the last several months spiralling and trying to mask the ever-crippling depression with literally all the fiction I can get my hands on. I’ve streamed so many shows, and made a list here! So join me while I spend a little longer ignoring my life and instead remembering all the great content I’ve seen lately.

Watch on Hulu

Brooklyn-99. Ok I was really late to this bandwagon since it first aired in 2013, but it’s my new favorite thing in the world. Bing-pot, bitches! Also Michael Schur is a god and I definitely binged all his shows as a byproduct of B99 blowing me away.

Superstore. Imagine The Office or Parks and Recreation but at WalMart, with all the stereotypical Walmart-type customers making each day new and exciting and horrible. Add some classic drama you find working any dead-end job, a few fun ships to follow, and bam! Suddenly your own life doesn’t feel so existentially bad. The production company also does some funny shit with the closing frames of each episode, and you can find a full list of their specialties here.

Watch on Netflix

The Good Place. Technically only seasons 1 and 2 are on Netflix—season 3 hasn’t been added yet and I bought it on Prime Video because I have control issues and didn’t want to wait (the last third of season 3 is on Hulu…for whatever reason). Knowing this show was representing an idea of the afterlife, I worried there would be too many religious undertones for me to enjoy it very much. WRONG! It’s another brilliant piece of work from Schur. This show seems to still be in production, with a new season coming out next year (fingers crossed). Also, who doesn’t love Ted Danson??

Master of None. This is a slice of life comedy with Aziz Ansari, 2 seasons/20 episodes, and I’m pretty sure it just ended out of nowhere which sucks balls because I really need to know what happens with those characters.

Stranger Things (new season). Holy shit can we talk about how much the kids have grown up since season 1? That is all.

Black Mirror (new season). The new season was only 3 episodes….but why though? It was still great, don’t get me wrong. It also led me to Bandersnatch, which was a semi-infuriating but overall wildly interesting adventure.

House of Cards (new season). I low-key forgot there was a new season in 2018 and finally got around to it. It’s sadly not as fun without Francis to stick his greedy fingers in everything, but Claire did some work trying to make up for his absence and I can get on board with that.

Watch on Amazon Prime Video (included with Prime sub)

Under the Dome. I was quite happy with this 3-season adaptation of the Stephen King book, even though it seemed to have a few Tommyknocker shenanigans peppered in as well. The ending was perfect for a King tale: out of nowhere with loose ends still dangling, leaving you knowing the story isn’t over but too fucking bad. I actually started reading the book again during the last season of the show (another fun distraction). I’m convinced they had to make some major changes to the original narrative since group rape scenes aren’t generally accepted outside HBO studios.

Watch on HBO

Barry. A strange mixture of hilarity and very powerful drama, 10/10 would recommend. Hitman-turns-actor is one of my new favorite narratives, and it turns out Bill Hader is a secret little writing genius.

I mean….this basically sums up Barry.

Euphoria. This is still airing the first season. Not for the faint of heart, as it addresses things that make many adults uncomfortable in normal situations…but with underaged teens. It talks very blatantly about addiction and depression and sexuality, and can be jarring for sensitive groups. But holy fuck it’s good, and I’ll be damned if someone watches it and can’t relate to at least one of the characters and their struggles (even if it results in an existential crisis).

So this is how I’ve been spending my time: diving headlong into anything I can to distract from the crushing hopelessness that seems to be everywhere. There’s a brighter future somewhere up ahead, the path is just a little difficult currently.

We’ll all get there eventually.